Marriage

In the world today, many people dismiss and even mock

marriage and the family. Amid such confusing and destructive

voices, the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve

Apostles provide the consistent voice of truth. They “solemnly

proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is

ordained of God and that the family is central to the

Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children” (see

“The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” page 59 in this

book).

Life’s greatest joys are found in the family. Strong family

relationships require effort, but such effort brings great happiness

in this life and throughout eternity. Even if you have

not had a happy family life in the past, you can seek to have a

happy, eternal marriage and a loving relationship with family

members.

The New and Everlasting Covenant of Marriage

In our Heavenly Father’s plan of happiness, a man and a

woman can be sealed to one another for time and all eternity.

Those who are sealed in the temple have the assurance that

their relationship will continue forever if they are true to their

covenants. They know that nothing, not even death, can permanently

separate them.

The covenant of eternal marriage is necessary for exaltation.

The Lord revealed through Joseph Smith: “In the celestial

glory there are three heavens or degrees; and in order to

obtain the highest, a man must enter into this order of the

priesthood [meaning the new and everlasting covenant of

marriage]; and if he does not, he cannot obtain it. He may

enter into the other, but that is the end of his kingdom; he

cannot have an increase” (D&C 131:1–4).

After receiving the sealing ordinance and making sacred

covenants in the temple, a couple must continue in faithfulness

in order to receive the blessings of eternal marriage and

exaltation. The Lord said:

“If a man marry a wife by my word, which is my law,

and by the new and everlasting covenant, and it is sealed

unto them by the Holy Spirit of promise, by him who is

anointed, unto whom I have appointed this power and the

keys of this priesthood; . . . and if [they] abide in my

covenant, . . . it shall be done unto them in all things whatsoever

my servant hath put upon them, in time, and through all

eternity; and shall be of full force when they are out of the

world” (D&C 132:19; for an explanation of the Holy Spirit of

Promise, see page 82).

Preparing for Marriage

If you are single, prepare yourself carefully for marriage.

Remember that there is no substitute for marrying in the

temple. Prepare to marry the right person in the right place

at the right time. Live worthy now of the kind of person you

hope to marry.

Date only those who have high standards and in whose

company you can maintain your high standards. Carefully

plan positive and constructive activities so that you and your

date are not left alone without anything to do. Stay in areas of

safety where you can easily control yourself. Do not participate

in conversations or activities that arouse sexual feelings.

Look for a companion of your own faith. Look for someone

you can always honor and respect, someone who will

complement you in your life. Before you marry, be sure you

have found someone to whom you can give your entire heart,

your entire love, your entire allegiance, your entire loyalty.

Counsel for Those Who Do Not Marry

Some members of the Church remain single through no

fault of their own, even though they want to marry. If you

find yourself in this situation, be assured that “all things

work together for good to them that love God” (Romans

8:28). As you remain worthy, you will someday, in this life

or the next, be given all the blessings of an eternal family

relationship. The Lord has made this promise repeatedly

through His latter-day prophets.

If you are single and desire to be married, do not give

up hope. At the same time, do not allow yourself to become

preoccupied with your goal. Instead, become anxiously

engaged in worthwhile activities. Look for ways to serve in

your extended family and in your community. Accept and

magnify Church callings. Keep yourself clean, both physically

and spiritually. Continue to learn and develop and progress

in your personal life.

Achieving a Happy Marriage

If you are married, remember that the friendship and

love between you and your spouse should be your most

cherished earthly relationship. Your spouse is the only person

other than the Lord whom you have been commanded to

love with all your heart (see D&C 42:22).

Remember that marriage, in its truest sense, is a partnership

of equals, with neither person exercising dominion over

the other, but with each encouraging, comforting, and helping

the other.

Because marriage is such an important relationship in

life, it needs and deserves time. Do not give higher priority to

less-important commitments. Take time to talk together and

to listen to one another. Be thoughtful and respectful. Express

tender feelings and affection often.

Determine that nothing will ever come between you and

your spouse to disrupt your marriage. Resolve to make your

marriage succeed, in spite of challenges that may arise.

Be loyal to one another. Be faithful in your marriage

covenants in thought, word, and deed. Remember that the

Lord has said, “Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart,

and shalt cleave unto her and none else” (D&C 42:22). The

phrase “none else” teaches that no person, activity, or possession

should ever take precedence over your relationship with

your spouse.

Stay away from anything that could lead you to be

unfaithful in any way. Pornography, unwholesome fantasies,

and flirtations will erode your character and strike at the

foundation of your marriage.

Work together to manage your finances. Cooperate in

establishing and following a budget. Discipline yourselves in

your spending, and avoid the bondage of debt. Wise money

management and freedom from debt contribute to peace in

the home.

Center your lives in the gospel of Jesus Christ. Help one

another keep the covenants you have made. Attend church

and the temple together. Study the scriptures together. Kneel

together in prayer at the beginning and end of each day to

thank your Heavenly Father for one another and to unite in

asking for His blessings on your lives, your home, your loved

ones, and your righteous desires. God will then guide you,

and your daily conversations with Him will bring the peace

and joy that can come from no other source. Your companionship

will sweeten through the years; your love will

strengthen. Your appreciation for one another will grow.

Additional references: Genesis 1:27–28; 2:18, 21–24; 1 Corinthians 11:11;

Ephesians 5:22–33; Moses 2:27–28; 3:18, 21–24

See also Chastity; Divorce; Family; Temples; Unity