Chastity

Chastity is sexual purity, a condition that is “pleasing unto

God” ( Jacob 2:7). To be chaste, you must be morally clean in

your thoughts, words, and actions. You must not have any

sexual relations before you are legally married. When you are

married, you must be completely faithful to your husband or

wife.

Physical intimacy between husband and wife is beautiful

and sacred. It is ordained of God for the creation of children

and for the expression of love within marriage.

In the world today, Satan has led many people to believe

that sexual intimacy outside of marriage is acceptable. But in

God’s sight, it is a serious sin. It is an abuse of the power He

has given us to create life. The prophet Alma taught that sexual

sins are more serious than any other sins except murder

and denying the Holy Ghost (see Alma 39:3–5).

Sometimes people try to convince themselves that sexual

relations outside of marriage are acceptable if the participants

love one another. This is not true. Breaking the law of

chastity and encouraging someone else to do so is not an

expression of love. People who love each other will never

endanger one another’s happiness and safety in exchange for

temporary personal pleasure.

When people care for one another enough to keep the

law of chastity, their love, trust, and commitment increase,

resulting in greater happiness and unity. In contrast, relationships

built on sexual immorality sour quickly. Those who

engage in sexual immorality often feel fear, guilt, and shame.

Bitterness, jealousy, and hatred soon replace any positive

feelings that once existed in their relationship.

Our Heavenly Father has given us the law of chastity for

our protection. Obedience to this law is essential to personal

peace and strength of character and to happiness in the

home. As you keep yourself sexually pure, you will avoid

the spiritual and emotional damage that always come from

sharing physical intimacies with someone outside of marriage.

You will be sensitive to the Holy Ghost’s guidance,

strength, comfort, and protection, and you will fulfill an

important requirement for receiving a temple recommend

and participating in temple ordinances.

Sexual Sins

The Lord and His prophets condemn sexual immorality.

All sexual relations outside of marriage violate the law of

chastity and are physically and spiritually dangerous for

those who engage in them.

The Ten Commandments include the command that we

not commit adultery, which is sexual intercourse between a

married man and someone other than his wife or between a

married woman and someone other than her husband (see

Exodus 20:14). The Apostle Paul said that it is “the will of

God” that we “abstain from fornication,” which is sexual

intercourse between an unmarried person and anyone else (1

Thessalonians 4:3). Latter-day prophets repeatedly speak out

against these sins and against the evil practice of sexual abuse.

Like other violations of the law of chastity, homosexual

activity is a serious sin. It is contrary to the purposes of

human sexuality (see Romans 1:24–32). It distorts loving

relationships and prevents people from receiving the bless-

ings that can be found in family life and the saving ordinances

of the gospel.

Merely refraining from sexual intercourse outside of marriage

is not sufficient in the Lord’s standard of personal purity.

The Lord requires a high moral standard of His disciples,

including complete fidelity to one’s spouse in thought and

conduct. In the Sermon on the Mount, He said: “Ye have

heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not

commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh

on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with

her already in his heart” (Matthew 5:27–28). In the latter days

He has said, “Thou shalt not . . . commit adultery, . . . nor do

anything like unto it” (D&C 59:6). And He has reemphasized

the principle He taught in the Sermon on the Mount: “He that

looketh on a woman to lust after her, or if any shall commit

adultery in their hearts, they shall not have the Spirit, but

shall deny the faith and shall fear” (D&C 63:16). These warnings

apply to all people, whether they are married or single.

If you have committed sexual sin, speak with your bishop

or branch president so he can help you through the process

of repentance (see “Repentance,” pages 132–35).

If you find yourself struggling with sexual temptations,

including feelings of same-gender attraction, do not give in

to those temptations. Be assured that you can choose to avoid

such behavior. You can receive the Lord’s help as you pray for

strength and work to overcome the problem. As part of this

process, you should seek counsel from your bishop or branch

president. He will help you.

Keeping the Law of Chastity

No matter how strong temptations seem, the Lord will

help you withstand them if you choose to follow Him. The

Apostle Paul declared, “There hath no temptation taken you

but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will

not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but

will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye

may be able to bear it” (1 Corinthians 10:13). The following

counsel can help you overcome the frequent and blatant

temptations in the world today:

Decide now to be chaste. You need to make this decision

only once. Make the decision now, before the temptation

comes, and let your decision be so firm and with such deep

commitment that it can never be shaken. Determine now that

you will never do anything outside of marriage to arouse the

powerful emotions that must be expressed only in marriage.

Do not arouse those emotions in another person’s body or in

your own body. Determine now that you will be completely

true to your spouse.

Control your thoughts. No one commits sexual sin in an

instant. Immoral acts always begin with impure thoughts. If

you allow your thoughts to linger on obscene or immoral

things, you have already taken the first step toward immorality.

Flee immediately from situations that may lead to sin.

Pray for constant strength to resist temptation and control

your thoughts. Make this a part of your daily prayers.

Stay away from pornography. Do not view, read, or listen

to anything that depicts or describes the human body or sexual

conduct in a way that can arouse sexual feelings.

Pornographic materials are addictive and destructive. They

can rob you of your self-respect and of a sense of the beauties

of life. They can tear you down and lead you to evil thoughts

and abusive conduct.

If you are single and dating, always treat your date with

respect. Never treat him or her as an object to be used for lustful

desires. Carefully plan positive and constructive activities

so that you and your date are not left alone without anything

to do. Stay in areas of safety where you can easily control

yourself. Do not participate in conversations or activities that

arouse sexual feelings. Do not participate in passionate kissing,

lie with or on top of another person, or touch the private,

sacred parts of another person’s body, with or without clothing.

Do not allow anyone to do such things with you.

If you are married, be faithful to your spouse in your thoughts,

words, and actions. The Lord has said: “Thou shalt love thy

wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none

else. And he that looketh upon a woman to lust after her shall

deny the faith, and shall not have the Spirit; and if he repents

not he shall be cast out” (D&C 42:22–23). Never flirt in any

way. As much as possible, avoid being alone with anyone of

the opposite sex. Ask yourself if your spouse would be

pleased if he or she knew of your words or actions. Remember

the Apostle Paul’s counsel to “abstain from all appearance of

evil” (1 Thessalonians 5:22). When you stay away from such

circumstances, temptation gets no chance to develop.

Forgiveness for the Repentant

The best course is complete moral cleanliness. It is wrong

to commit sexual sins with the thought that you will simply

repent later. This attitude is a sin itself, showing irreverence

for the Lord and the covenants you make with Him.

However, if you have committed sexual sins, the Lord offers

forgiveness if you repent.

Repentance is difficult, but it is possible. You can be clean

again (see Isaiah 1:18). The despair of sin can be replaced

with the sweet peace of forgiveness. To learn what you must

do to repent, see “Repentance,” pages 132–35.

Work toward the day when you will be worthy to enter

the temple, guided by the words of the Psalmist:

“Who shall ascend into the hill of the Lord? or who shall

stand in his holy place?

“He that hath clean hands, and a pure heart” (Psalm

24:3–4).

Additional references: Exodus 20:14; 1 Corinthians 6:18–20; Alma 38:12;

3 Nephi 12:27–30

See also Marriage; Pornography